


A Miracle?

by MagnetoTheMagnificent



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Anxious Aziraphale (Good Omens), Baby snake, Caring Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crack Treated Seriously, Egg Laying, Eggpreg, If you use female pronouns in the comments I will fight you, Kid Fic, M/M, Medical Professionals, Occult, POV Outsider, Pregnant Crowley (Good Omens), Scared Crowley (Good Omens), Seraphim, Snake Crowley (Good Omens), Trans Crowley (Good Omens), kind of, parthenogenesis, snake biology
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:48:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28052685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagnetoTheMagnificent/pseuds/MagnetoTheMagnificent
Summary: Something is wrong with Crowley, and both Crowley and Aziraphale are in for a surprise when they visit an occult doctor.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 109





	1. Chapter 1

It hadn’t been that long since Armageddon didn’t happen. About a month had passed, and if he was to be honest, Crowley was coping. If coping meant impulsively smashing his television screen and tossing his ansaphone in a fit of paranoia. He was stressed, and it made him anxious that he wasn’t happier that the world hadn’t ended. On the one hand, he was overjoyed that the world was still standing. He loved the Earth, and he loved living on it, and he never wanted it to be destroyed. But on the other hand, he never really planned for Armageddon not happening, and him coming out unscathed. For the last eleven years, he had made peace with the fact that either the Apocalypse would happen, and he’d be caught in the crossfire between Heaven and Hell, and likely be another casualty of war; or he and Aziraphale would successfully save the world from destruction, but he’d have to pay the price in Hell for his treachery. There was no outcome he could think of where he didn’t perish or spend an eternity in pain. 

But now, now he was free- and he didn’t know how to cope with that reality. 

Aziraphale first noticed something was wrong when Crowley barely ate when they had dinner together. He didn’t even have dessert, which was his favourite course. Crowley loved food, especially sweet food, and now he hardly touched his chocolate lava cake.

Another thing Aziraphale noticed was Crowley’s increasing defensiveness. He seemed to flinch more, and he hardly left his flat unless prompted. He was more withdrawn, and constantly on edge. 

“Crowley, my dear, is everything alright?” he asked one evening.

Crowley was lying on his back under a heat lamp, a strained expression on his face. 

“Ngh,” was the demon’s reply. 

Aziraphale frowned worriedly and knelt by his friend’s side. 

“You’re not due for a shed, are you?” 

Crowley shook his head.

“Don’t think so."

“And your joints?”

“I’m fine,” Crowley snapped with a grimace.

Aziraphale sighed. 

“Crowley you haven’t eaten in weeks. Clearly you’re not fine,” he said. 

“Well, obviously I’d tell you if something was wrong,” Crowley muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Would you care if I tried to discern what the issue is?”

“What, like an occult medical exam?”

“Angels are ethereal, my dear,” Aziraphale smiled, “and no, not anything medical, lord knows I’m hardly qualified. I’m thinking more of a metaphysical troubleshoot, take a peek at your true form, just to make sure there’s nothing supernatural involved.”

“I’d know if Hell had anything to do with this, angel, believe me,” Crowley replied. 

“All the same, it wouldn’t hurt to rule it out. I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you.”

They both shuddered, thinking of the worst. 

“Alright,” Crowley said, resigned.

“Search me.”

Aziraphale gave him a small smile. 

“It would be helpful if you sat up,” he instructed. 

Crowley rolled his eyes and groaned as he moved into a seated position. 

“There you are,” Aziraphale murmured.

He closed his eyes and took Crowley’s hands, reaching out into his true form. He could feel the paradoxical chill and warmth of Crowley’s essence, cold-blooded yet fiery and passionate. They had seen each others’ true forms before, in their most intimate moment, and Aziraphale immediately knew something was wrong. Something was leeching off of Crowley’s energy, and he had no idea what. 

“Crowley!” he gasped when he returned to the Earthly plane. 

There were tears in his eyes and he trembled from fear.

“What is it?” Crowley asked fearfully. 

“I don’t know, Crowley. Something- something’s wrong.”

“Hell?” 

“I don’t know. We need, we need to get you help. Something’s hurting you, Crowley, and we need to find out what.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning if you don't like medical stuff. Nothing serious, though.

Doctor Janice Evans graduated medical school intending on pursuing a career as a General Practitioner. She never really had any specific medical field in mind, only that she wanted to help heal people. Being a GP seemed the best option at the time. It was during her first years in practice that she found her new calling- supernatural related illnesses and health. 

She was never an affiliated religious person growing up. Oh, she believed in a higher power, something in her was certain there was something beyond humanity, but she didn’t quite understand it the way she was taught in Church. She even dabbled in atheism before she realized that Christianity wasn’t the mark of all religions. If asked, Doctor Evans would say she was “spiritual.” Personally she felt that personal religious beliefs had no place in the medical field. So when a patient claiming to be a vampire concerned about spreading blood-transmittable illnesses came into her practice, she had no pre-existing religious bias against the man. When she discovered that the patient was indeed a vampire, medically undead by all charts, she was almost glad that her logical views were upended. Any other fact-driven academic would simply refuse that such a creature could exist, but Evans just simply accepted it. It would be the marker that changed her entire career. 

When two men walked into her office, it had been a rather slow day for Doctor Evans. Normally she would request that a patient call beforehand, so that she could prepare her office accordingly for their visit- removing silver objects, salt, etc. -but these men simbly burst through her door. One was a larger, older looking man, with elegantly manicured fingernails and a fancy silk scarf. The other, shorter and leaner looking man, seemed to be more of the supernatural type. His skin was a pale gray, and she could just barely make out what looked like scales peppering his exposed neck and face.

“Are you Doctor Janice Evans?” the taller man asked. 

“I am,” Evans nodded. 

The taller man sighed in relief and gripped the other man’s hand.   
‘So they’re a couple,’ Evans mused.

“I’m Aziraphale,” the man said, holding out his plump hand. 

Evans knew better not to shake it. 

“This is err, my husband, Anthony Crowley,” he continued. 

“How do you do?” the other man, Anthony, said politely. 

Doctor Evans smiled at the couple and handed them a clipboard with a form attached. 

“Just fill out your information here, then, and I’ll see to you shortly,” she said. 

“It’s urgent,” Aziraphale pressed. 

“It’ll take two seconds,” Evans replied flatly. 

“Whichever one of you is the patient should fill it out.”

“I am,” said Anthony, taking the clipboard. 

“Wonderful,” Evans said as he handed back the filled out form.

She glanced over it. 

“You’re both demons?” she asked. 

Aziraphale shook his head.

“I’m an angel, he’s a demon. And we’d appreciate it if you would keep this visit confidential,” he explained. 

“Oh, not to worry, sir, patient confidentiality still applies to the occult,” Evans assured him. 

“Have you ever had an examination before, Mr. Crowley?” Evans asked in the exam room. 

Anthony shook his head, looking a bit scared. 

“Well, it’s pretty similar to a regular human examination, which I’m assuming you also haven’t had.”

Anthony’s eyes, which by now she had seen were serpent eyes, widened in fear. 

“I’m not going to hurt you, Anthony,” Evans said gently. 

“I think I’ve figured out what’s going on, but I’m going to need to be sure before I say anything,” Doctor Evans said once she finished her initial examination. 

“What is it?” Aziraphale and Anthony asked simultaneously. 

“I want to take a multi-planar x-ray first,” she replied. 

“Well, that confirms it,” she said as she reviewed the images. 

“Confirms what?”

Evans looked from Aziraphale to Anthony. 

“You haven’t been sexually active with another snake within the past few months, right?” she asked Anthony. 

Anthony shook his head. 

“Of course not! Why would I-”

“Just trying to rule anything out. Angels have been infertlie since the Nephilim incident, and obviously you wouldn’t copulate with a regular snake, which leaves…”

“Do you know what parthenogenesis is?” she suddenly asked. 

“What are you talking about?” Anthony asked in confusion. 

“Mr. Crowley,” Evans said gently, handing him the x-ray images.

“You’re gravid.” 

Anthony looked over the images of his serpent form. There, clear as day, were the distinct shapes of five eggs in his snake body. 

“Gravid? Like-like pregnant?” he stammered. 

He looked at Aziraphale and then at Evans, his face drawn up in shock. 

“But I- he- I don’t-”

“Aziraphale isn’t the father,” Evans explained. 

“You spawned the eggs yourself, which isn’t uncommon in reptilian species.”

“But I’ve never done that before. I’ve never-”

“It’s a common occurrence when a creature is stressed. Have there been any significant changes recently that may have triggered it?” Evans asked. 

“Erm...yes, I think,” Anthony replied, looking helplessly at Aziraphale.

Aziraphale moved closer to hold his hand reassuringly. 

“So the...eggs..those are what’s been draining his energy?” Aziraphale asked. 

Doctor Evans nodded. 

“There are five eggs growing inside him. Of course it would take energy.”

“What can you do about it? I don’t want there to be five eggs inside me!” Anthony cried.

“Well, unfortunately we can’t remove them at this point. It’s too risky,” Evans answered regretfully. 

“The best we can do is wait for the eggs to be laid, and most likely they’ll turn out to be duds, anyway.”

“I’ll have to- to give birth?!” Anthony exclaimed. 

“Not in your human form, but yes, you’ll have to lay the eggs in your serpent form.”

“What are the risks in that process?” Aziraphale asked quietly. 

“Well, egg-laying is a natural process. Most likely it’ll go smoothly, and if the eggs are all duds- meaning infertile- as I suspect, you won’t have to worry once they’ve been passed.”

“And if they’re fertile?” asked Anthony.

“Then it’s your choice to incubate them or not. If you incubate them, they’ll eventually hatch into newborn snakes. If you don’t incubate them, then you can treat them like duds and toss them.”

“Won’t they be alive, though?” Anthony wondered. 

“Well, yes and no. Technically they’d be a living organism with cells, but the fetus would be hardly developed enough for it to matter,” Evans explained. 

“Is there anything I can do to help him? Be comfortable, I mean,” Aziraphale asked slowly. 

“I have a leaflet about reptilian reproduction, if you’d like,” she offered. 

They both nodded.

“Pregnancy is a stresser, both physically and emotionally, Aziraphale, so the best you can do is be a supportive and caring husband, which I suspect you already are.”

Crowley leaned back in his seat in the Bentley after they left Doctor Evans’s office. 

“The last I expected was this,” he mumbled with a sigh.

“You know I’ll be with you every step of the way,” Aziraphale said softly. 

“Aziraphale,” Crowley said with a chocked sound. 

“I’m scared.”

Aziraphale pulled him into a hug. He didn’t have the heart to say that he, too, was terrified. 

“I’m here for you,” he said instead. 

In that moment, it would have to be enough.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning for description of egg-laying

Crowley glanced fleetingly at the children’s boutique as he and Aziraphale walked past the shops. It was getting closer to the projected due date, and he was a bundle of nerves. He knew Aziraphale was trying to help- taking him to his favourite restaurants, films, and parks, and he really appreciated the angel’s efforts. Lately, however, all Crowley wanted to do was sleep in a warm bed.

He had been thinking about babies a lot lately. He was terrified about having to give birth, lay eggs, well, it was all the same. And he felt terrible, because deep down, a gnawing part of him was excited. He felt terrible for ruining Aziraphale’s routine- Aziraphale hardly ever spent time without him now. Aziraphale must be so tired of him. 

“How are you feeling?” Aziraphale asked that night as he handed him a mug of tea. 

“M’fine,” Crowley mumbled. 

“Something on your mind?

“I’msorryaboutruiningyourlife,” Crowley blurted out as Aziraphale sat down on the couch next to him. 

Aziraphale set down his tea on the coffee table and looked at Crowley with concern. 

“Ruining my life?” he repeated quietly. 

“Upending it. You’re so busy taking care of me, with all this pregnancy, gravid stuff. I know it stresses you out,” Crowley explained. 

Aziraphale frowned. 

“I’ll admit I have been stressed lately,” he said slowly, “but it’s only because I’m anxious about your wellbeing.”

“Of course I wish it were easier for you, but now that it’s a reality- I wouldn’t walk away from it.”

He touched Crowley's hand, and in response, Crowley squeezed it. 

“But what if a part of me wants...a..baby…. now?” Crowley asked in a whisper. 

“Crowley, if you lay fertile eggs, and you choose to incubate them, I would happily help you raise whatever children they yield- snake, human, demon, angel. I will support whatever decision you make,” Aziraphale replied seriously. 

“I never- never wanted to have a child alone, Aziraphale, I never wanted this, you know,” Crowley explained. 

“But if I’m having a child with you- it’s not such a bad thing to imagine.” 

Weeks later, Aziraphale woke up in his and Crowley’s shared bed to find it empty.

“Crowley?” he said in alarm, blearily looking around the room.   
His eyes landed on a squirming pile of sheets. Inside the sheets was a small snake- Crowley. 

Crowley looked up at him with wide golden eyes, his tongue flickering anxiously. 

“It’s alright, darling,” Aziraphale soothed, bringing him into the nest box they had prepared earlier. 

“Just let it happen.”

Crowley coiled into a tight ball, small shivers rippling across his spine. 

“You’ll be alright.”

They had already prepared a nest box, and an incubating container should the eggs turn out fertile. All Aziraphale had to do was wait, and support Crowley. They couldn’t communicate well when Crowley was in his snake form, especially when Crowley was using all his energy in the egg-laying process. 

It was nearly two hours before the first egg began to emerge. Crowley nudged his head against Aziraphale’s finger as he pushed out the egg. Aziraphale could feel the strain on his body. 

“You’re doing so well,” Aziraphale coaxed. 

The egg finally slid out of Crowley’s cloaca and settled onto the aspen. From its shape and colour, Aziraphale could tell it was a dud. Crowley shuddered and hissed.

“That was the first one, my dear. I’m so proud of you,” Aziraphale murmured. 

The next egg began to descend, and Aziraphale gently massaged Crowley’s belly. 

“I know it’s uncomfortable love, but I believe in you,” he whispered. 

Soon, another infertile egg joined the first one, and then a third, and a fourth. They lay in a haphazard pile by Crowley’s tail. 

“One more left, darling, you’re almost there,” Aziraphale told his friend. 

Crowley writhed against his hand, his face contorted in pain. His breathing became laboured as he strained to push out the last egg. His efforts seemed futile as he became more and more exhausted. 

Reluctantly, Aziraphale stood up. 

“I’ll be back in a second, dearest,” he promised, and filled a small tub with warm water. 

When he returned, Crowley was still struggling. Aziraphale carefully placed him in the water, and gently rubbed around the visible bulge of the last egg. 

“It’s alright, you’re alright,” Aziraphale breathed, more a mantra than an assurance. 

Slowly the egg moved down the length of Crowley’s tail, and began to emerge towards the end. Crowley’s cloaca stretched from the width of the egg, and Crowley let out pained gasps for air as it made its way out. Finally it rolled onto the rest of the eggs, and Aziraphale’s eyes widened. Unlike the other eggs, this egg was whiter, rounder- it looked fertile. 

Crowley slumped against Aziraphale’s hand, having fallen asleep from exhaustion. 

“Oh, you’re so strong, so brave,” Aziraphale whispered as he carefully moved Crowley into a more comfortable position. 

Reverently, he picked up the fertile egg and placed it in the incubating container. It was smaller than his palm, and oh so delicate. He then placed a soft kiss on Crowley’s forehead as the demon slept.


	4. Chapter 4

“Angel,” Crowley croaked as he woke up.

Aziraphale smiled at him and stroked his hand. 

“Good morning, my dear,” he said lovingly.

Crowley had slept fretfully throughout the day after laying the eggs, and the night afterwards had returned to his human form in his sleep. All the while Aziraphale had kept careful watch over him. 

Crowley glanced at the heat lamp in the corner of the room, where a small container lay underneath, absorbing its warmth. 

“What’s that?” he asked tiredly. 

“Out of the five eggs, my dear, you laid one fertile egg,” Aziraphale told him. 

A small smile passed over Crowley’s face and he laid back against his pillow. 

“You were so tough,” Aziraphale continued.

“I can’t imagine how painful it was.”

“Ngk. Still feels a bit sore. Down there, you know,” Crowley winced. 

“Even in your human form?”

“Still affects it, even if it’s more phantom pain,” he explained. 

For the next month, both Aziraphale and Crowley kept watch over the small egg. Crowley’s strength began to return little by little. They anxiously marked down the days on the calendar until the projected hatching day. 

“What do you suppose it’ll be?” Crowley mused a few days before the egg was due to hatch. 

“The hatchling?” Aziraphale replied. 

“Yeah. I don’t think it’ll be just a regular snake, you know?”

Aziraphale tapped his chin thoughtfully. 

“Well, from what I read about parthenogenesis, it’ll be almost a perfect clone of you. So….a demon?”

Crowley shook his head. 

“Genetics, angel,” he said, “I started out as an angel, only became a demon afterwards. My bet is it’ll be angel.” 

He stared into his coffee.

“How do you feel about that?” Aziraphale asked slowly. 

Crowley shrugged. 

“I mean, I was a pretty good Seraph back in the day. It’ll be like looking at an age-reversed mirror,” he reasoned. 

“Yes, but how would you feel about seeing a reminder of your days as an angel?” Aziraphale clarified. 

“It would be weird, I’m sure. I didn’t used to be so pale- I was handsomer then. But I don’t regret Falling, you know,” he said quietly. 

“Darling, I assure you, you are every bit handsome now,” Aziraphale replied. 

Crowley felt his cheeks grow warmer. 

“You’re just saying that,” he mumbled. 

“I am not!” Aziraphale protested, getting out of his seat to stand over Crowley. 

He kissed Crowley firmly on the lips and tapped his nose lightly. 

“You just like it when I compliment you,” he teased.

“Maybe,” Crowley said slyly. 

They heard a small noise coming from the egg box, and both men gasped. Aziraphale knelt by the box as Crowley carefully removed the lid. Inside, the one egg had developed a tiny crack, and as angel and demon watched with bated breaths, a small wet snout poked out of the egg. 

Tears sprang from their eyes as the tiny head emerged from the soft shell. It looked like a miniature version of Crowley’s snake form. 

“Hello, little one,” Crowley cooed, sticking his hand into the box. 

Hesitantly, the baby snake slithered out of the egg, as if recognizing the presence of their father. It crawled onto Crowley’s hand and flicked out its little tongue. Crowley returned the gesture and smiled. 

Crowley raised his hand so that the hatchling was at Aziraphale’s face level. 

“Hello,” Aziraphale whispered, as if afraid his voice would be too powerful for the baby. 

“Say hello to your other daddy,” Crowley said. 

In response the hatchling flicked out its tongue, causing Aziraphale to elicit a chuckle. 

“This is an angel, you know,” Aziraphale told Crowley. 

“A Seraph.”

“My little angel,” murmured Crowley, bringing his face closer to his baby. 

The hatchling tickled Crowley’s nose with his tongue. 

“What are you going to call him?” Aziraphale asked.

“Nissim,” Crowley answered with a smile.


End file.
